How to combat self-loathing

If you have ever encountered self-loathing, self-hatred or low self-esteem, you might have had thoughts like “I hate myself.” “I’m not good enough.” “I don’t excel in everything I do.” It can be demoralizing to have these thoughts and can lead to serious depression or other mental problems.

Are your self-hating thoughts problematic?

We have all had thoughts of self-hatred if not once or twice. Having a bit of self-consciousness is a good thing. It meaning we put our shortcomings into consideration. It is this awareness that contributes to our ability to be compassionate towards others. the most important part of growth and maturity is self-critique.

The problem comes when thoughts like; I don’t love myself dominate thinking.  You can be asked a few questions:

  • Do your self –hatred thoughts make it hard for you to achieve your goals of function well in life?
  • Can I do away with these thoughts or does it look like they just come into my head without permission?
  • Am I going through worthless moments, depression or, just general darkness that is linked to these thoughts?

How to cope with self-hating thoughts

Self-hatred and low self-esteem have certain degrees. Some of us just encounter these thoughts and feelings intermittently. To some, it is not easy to get a handle on since self-loathing is a constant reality. It doesn’t matter what the case might be, nobody should feel like they just have to cope with these feelings.

Believing that you deserve better is not easy, more so if you have lived with low-self-esteem for long. However, it’s possible to feel good about yourself and to just do away with those “I hate myself” thoughts.

Below are ways you can get started:


This idea of meditation may sound relaxing especially to someone who has dark racing thoughts. However, unlike well-known belief, meditating doesn’t need you to stop thinking. It wants you to keep noticing them. You should become more mindful of your thoughts and then decide what to do with them, whether to ignore them, acknowledge them or react to them.


At times the only way to release our thoughts is just moving them from inside our head to a different medium. You don’t have to write complete sentences to do journaling. Just take 5 minutes and write everything that’s going on in your mind, it can be therapeutic and is likely to give you a little perspective.

Speak to a counselor

Knowing where your self-hatred originates from is not easy and for many of us, we prefer doing so under the care of a therapist. A good counselor may help you know why you have low self-esteem.

They can even help you with things you can to heal. I know it’s not easy to speak to a therapist for the first time, but trust you me, a therapist knows it all and cannot judge you.

Be around positive people

You should know how some people have contributed to your negative thoughts especially when you are in the process of understanding your feelings of self-loathing. Choose to be around people who uplift you and inspire you to do better. You will lead a happy life when you have these people to guide you.

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